MESSAGE FOR THE ORANGE PUMPKIN

Don, go away, you’re no good for me (or anyone)

Last night I powered down my cell phone because the constant barrage of breaking news alerts was driving me crazy. I needed to lock our asshole president out of my mind and life for a bit. Now this may seem like a non sequitur, but I get depressed when I go to the grocery store and see people not wearing masks. It saddens me to think my fellow citizens don’t care about life, but then I realize they don’t know any better because the large man in charge says masks are unnecessary. At times I wonder if I might be taking it all too seriously. For years I have been writing about how Donald Trump is bad for America, but every time another of his acts exposes himself for the authentic jerk he is, I get angry all over again. For example, take his latest onslaught of pardons. Trump would absolve Hitler if Adolf said nice things about him.

I wish I could form a mental blockade to impose a Trump blackout, but that’s not going to happen. He’s so needy for publicity and attention he will always find a way to make news and noise. It’s just not likely that he will ever melt away like snow in Florida. I wake up refreshed, fetch my local paper, read the letters to the editor and get set off all over again.

Let me share this one, Lest we forget, here is a reminder of some of the accomplishments of the Trump administration during Donald Trump’s four years in office.” Okay, I must take a deep breath here and prepare to handle each of these allegations.

The writer, whose name I will keep anonymous, says that Trump kept us out of wars. Well, the act of getting into a war is serious and should be done only if we need to defend our country or help our allies. The so-called success of war avoidance is a terribly low bar for any president. Yes, we didn’t have a war under the Donald but he facilitated global conflict by selling arms and equipment to warring nations. He pulled out of Syria, which was nothing short of abandoning our allies, the Kurds. Obama didn’t get the US into any wars, but he was chastised for leaving Iraq too early and creating ISIS. So, what will probably happen as the result of Trump’s withdrawal of troops from troubled, unsettled conflicts? More war! GRADE: D

Next, there’s the claim that Trump oversaw the Abraham Accords, normalizing relations between Israel and two Arab states, the United Arab Emirates and Bahrain. The term “oversaw” is a long stretch. Yes, Israel is trying to play nice in the Middle East but, from the beginning, the goal of the Trump Administration was bringing peace to the region. How will establishing normal diplomatic relations with just a couple of Arab nations bring the Palestinians to the table? GRADE: C+

The writer boasts about Trump’s insistence that NATO countries pay their fair shares of the costs for their own protection. Okay, that’s fair, but realize this is not nations giving money to NATO but rather increasing spending on their military assets and agents. Should any nation demand that the US increase or decrease our military budget we would be repulsed and offended but, okay, time for more guns and bombs. GRADE: B

Our esteemed letter writer continues with a group of deeds and triumphs that can be placed under one heading, Immigration. The letter says Trump got Mexico to keep asylum seekers in their country until their US hearings come up, to strengthen its US border and to work with Central American countries to slow the exodus of their citizens. I guess this would be a reasonable achievement for those who subscribe to the anti-immigrant, xenophobic viewpoints of this administration, but let’s not forget that Trump also separated children from their parents at the border. His Attorney General said that abhorrent policy would deter others wanting to seek asylum. This is less a win and more a sinful, immoral myopia. We must never forget that we are a country of immigrants! GRADE: F

Now, here’s a claim that profoundly pisses me off. The writer alleges that the Clean Power Plan, which Trump repealed, would have increased our electricity bills and he adds that our energy needs were kept affordable by Trump’s abandonment of the Paris Climate Agreement. This is total bullshit. The extreme weather events and catastrophes caused by climate change will cost us more money. In fact, deploying solar energy in a sunshine climate like Florida would lower energy costs significantly. Someone drank all the Kool-Aid, kids. GRADE: F

Our unnamed letter writer concludes his missive with compliments about how Trump confronted China over the theft of American intellectual property and unfair trade practices, how he imposed sanctions on Russia and closed some of our consulates there and how he kept our oil prices low, which hurt the Russian economy.

Okay, I’ll take these things in order, or should I say odor, because they fail the smell test. The first point is rather funny. All the people at “state” and “justice” said Russia was behind the hacking of government servers, but Trump insisted it was China. So, the “confrontation” Trump and his sycophants lowered on China’s head did nothing to stop Russia and China stealing from us.

As for Russians and oil, Trump has bragged about the USA being energy independent due to our large supplies of oil and natural gas. So, how did sanctions against Russia help our gas prices, which are set by OPEC and Trump’s friends in Saudi Arabia? The truth is Trump has gone easy on Russia and used China and Xi as props during his overly long rally speeches. We have not become stronger in foreign policy under Trump. China’s economy grew despite COVID and North Korea has a nuclear bomb. GRADE: F

The final contention of our reader/writer is Trump helped speed the record-breaking development of COVID-19 vaccines. He says, “As bombastic and irritating as Trump is, a lot was accomplished during his tenure.” REALLY? This comment is totally disqualified and no GRADE is low enough. The claim of Trump speeding vaccine development would be like me taking credit for the Pittsburgh Pirates beating the New York Yankees in the 1960 World Series. After all, I watched the game on TV.

With more than 323,000 people dead from this wretched virus, a total failure in medical supply chain management, no national policy to defend the US from the pandemic and the administration’s ongoing disregard of expert recommendations for virus mitigation, these past four years have seen America at her worst. The things Trump has said on TV and in his tweets have made matters worse, not better. Because of his lack of action and unconvincing language, Donald John Trump has killed Americans. The man doesn’t deserve to be praised; he should be indicted for malfeasance and put in jail. Maybe someone will pardon him.

All of us want COVID to go away. While that would be great, some of us just can’t wait until the Donald goes away because he’s been bad for America. Perhaps he merits a participation trophy, but don’t try to sell me on any grand accomplishments. My 401K lost a ton of money, I can’t see my grandkids this Christmas, and he’s going to be playing golf. I hate him. Merry Freaking Christmas, Mr. Soon-to-be Ex-President!

[EDITORS NOTE: There will be no blog tomorrow, MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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One thought on “MESSAGE FOR THE ORANGE PUMPKIN

  1. I remember a joke I heard along time ago, not so much because it was funny, but because it was telling. These two Irish gunners in a British fighter under attack during World War II were arguing about the governance of Eamon De valera, prime minister of the Republic of Ireland during the war. Mr. De valera had a colorful past, including involvement in the Easter Uprising that, at one point, had him marked for death by the British government. As the argument went on, it became clear the men had been on differing sides of the question of Irish independence, and they were never going to agree on De valera. All of a sudden, a bomb went off so close the plane shook, and both men were thrown like a couple of matchsticks to the floor of the craft. When they finally got up and collected themselves, the British loyalists said, “Well, I’ll give him one thing. He kept us out of the war.” It always struck me as so Irish that the pair had enlisted in the forces of the British government when their own government was trying so hard to stay out of the fray. I guess that was the joke. But what it really made clear in an unfunny way is that UPSET and DISRUPTION and CHAOS spread, no matter how good you think you are at containing them. What you seem to escape at one point has a way of engulfing us all. The late John Lewis coined the phrase “good trouble,” but Donald Trump has never been able to convince me that there is such a thing as “good chaos.” All the while Trump has persuaded his followers that he is somehow making them safer, life on the planet becomes more and more dangerous. We cannot be safe by walling ourselves off — and even worse — by treating the rest of earth’s residents as if what we need matters, to the exclusion of anyone else. Whenever a Trump supporter starts checking off his accomplishments, I can’t help but see the potential consequences of them. Yes, he’ll be gone — and the sooner the better — but we will live with his view of “safety” to our sorrow. And on that note, happy holidays to the readers of this blog I find I enjoy so much.

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